Please say 'yes' if you have ever felt this way. your guy has put you into this feeling. On the surface level you and the rest of the world will see that oh! he is nice, loving, caring or atleast half of everyhing you thought he would be. you made peace with rest of the half that is not there because you focus on his"efforts".i want you to emphasise on efforts because that is what, we all differ at.Efforts make an image of a person.i think i have judged every guy on the basis of their level of efforts they put in a situation that they could have easily let go of.That makes them a Gentlemen.
There was this guy i came across.We met in a get-togather.and for some situation he was droping me home. he was very outspoken and talking about himself ,flaunting and pretty loud so in a way everything went against the imagination of a guy i would like to meet again (i m extremely choosy when it comes to choose who's worth my time).by the time i reached my place i made up my mind that i m not seeing him again.but as the car stopped he gently came towards my car window and gently he bent a bit took a step back and opened the door for me.
That little effort made me change my mind instantly,because he gave respect,he earned it back from me.this got me into his bubble and we started meeting,he made sure to get me a gesture gift from as sweet as a rose to a beautiful dress with the matching accessories aknowledging that we are going out.so even if this guy was not with her kind of guy,she focused on those cute little efforts that felt beautiful.afterall who doesn't love such attention.
Time went by,things happened and the guy was still there but doing none of the above.yeah! it rings the bell while reading it ,but in real we keep a sweet hope that yeah, today i might be suprised by him.he is late may be he is picking something on the way for me.yeyy!its my birthday i m wondering what he must be getting me.she waits like she used to wait for her dad once with a gift in his hand for her.it dint happened back then.it is not happening now.poor girl.she can't say it . i mean ofcourse who says you are not getting me a rose or chocklate,or please share a glance. so the expectation results in stupid diverted fights and we wonder what happened.
your friends will tell you that he doesn't love you anymore or he takes you forgranted or he is too busy or in tensionor under family pressure (all this crap which was always there ,never there at the same time).
Gentlemen who must be reading it would be thinking that why only men have to do this? i will tell you why.
you must have heard this eponymous metaphor: 'Men are from Mars,Women are from Venus'.well that's how we differ .we are made way too different with divided responsibities.Men are meant to protect,cover,suffice women whereas women is meant to Love, support, cook, listen and to satisfy the Men.Ideally when a Men satisfy her financial needs, Get Gifts, protect her, surprises her.Women feels complete and in return she gives immense love,satisfaction and happiness in all the possible ways.Women are meant to love men and men are meant to fulfill her desires.Now that is the balance that is natural since the era we used to believe that women will stay at home,men will go and earn money to take care of her finances as a part of his duty.
Coming back, Regardless of who you blame for your current situation.i believe we ourselves are the reason.somewhere, we become unattractive without even realizing it.when we are hurt but we wear an attitude mask and still go back to take more and show as if nothing is bothering me.we wouldn't choose the simple method called Asking.we don't want to tell but we expect ur betterhalf to understand us.trust me ladies men are really bad at picking cues and behavioural hints and that doesn't make them bad,it just makes them different.
First thing we should be doing is tearing that mask away(as there has to be atleast somebody with whom you can be you)and for god's sake talk with a gentle tone .Afterall small issues turns into arument only because of the tone you use.
Second, Know your intensions.Analyse your giving process,how much are you giving and fulfilling his unsaid expectations.Is it just a one way expectation where u thnk just because you are pretty ,he should be doing everything(see guys, i m taking ue side;) ?Do you focus only on what you should be given inspite of what you have to serve.Know your real need and reason to be with someone.Once you are clear about why exactly are you there,other things would naturally stop bothering you.
Third and final step to win over is to 'Kill them with your kindness' Afterall they are also emotional being,they too need alot of love and pampering.so especially when your mind doesnt give you any reason to be good to him,convience your heart to give him all you have got.to make it easier i will give you a trick which works like magic to save relationships.write down 10 qualities which brought you close to that person when you first got along.Love him unconitionally.you will have him back more than ever and even then if its not working out, then girls!
No reason to stay,is a good reason to leave.
Afterall "You are too full of life Dear Darling, to be half loved"
cheers!
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